"Bring on Duke!"
So says Lou Holtz. Notre Dame might be playing in the "Duke Super Bowl" come Saturday afternoon, but don’t tell that to Lou

Now if only Weis’s Woefuls had that much emotion, passion and heart as the old, white, wrinkled up version of Steve Urkel! Might I suggest putting the baby to bed, hiding the women and children for this one! And while you’re at it, you might want to see if Michael Vick’s available to watch your dog! I hear he needs the money…And besides, Vick just loves dogs! Rocky shouldn’t be subjected to such cruel punishment….The game that is!

And for yourself....Have an unlimited supply of your favorite cold, frosty beverage!! Believe me...You're going to need it for this epic battle! Or in Lou's words..."Your pain pills!"

Happy Thanksgiving to the few select wild turkeys who read my spits and spats...I'm out for Thanksgiving leave, Last Row style! Be back whenever I damn well please!

Who’s Number One in the Female Student Body Championship Series?
Like any college football season, once it hit’s mid-November, as we are right now anything and everything is up for debate!

Who’s the front runner for the Heisman? Is it Dennis Dixon? Do I hear Darren McFadden? Did somebody say Tim Tebow? Although with the Gaytors having three loses, why in the hell is he worth mentioning still? What, just because he puts up Colt Brennan type numbers against more stellar opponents? And, that just proves my "debate" theory!

Then we get to number one…LSU stands atop the polls currently, but are they really the best team? OSWHO held that position for sometime until the Fighting Zookers came into The Shoe and finally gave the nation some hard evidence that the Buckeyes were overrated! Now heading into this weekends slate of games, the top five of the BCS Standings go a little something like this…
1. LSU 9-1 .980
2. Oregon 8-1 .938
3. Kansas 10-0 .909
4. Oklahoma 9-1 .854
5. Missouri 9-1 .810

So now that we’ve all stuck that in our crack pipe and smoked it like a scene from Grandma’s Boy it seems that we have more controversy on our hands! Wow, what a surprise! Who would’ve thought that? I mean it is only mid-November! So many questions, so many answers having the two little words "What if…Although it is a par 72 for the course! Right now we’re currently asking ourselves the following…If rabbits' feet are so lucky, then what happened to the rabbit? If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?

If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it Fed UP? If quitters never win, and winners never quit, what fool came up with, "Quit while you're ahead"? Confused any? Try this one!
If you take an Oriental person and spin him around several times, what happens…Does he become disoriented? Well not to worry for all of you who are disoriented from the BCS brain cramp…Don’t worry, we all are there with each other! So let’s have some fun, shall we? I’m thinking yeah…No, No, Hell Yeah!

Taking the BCS top five teams in no numerical order and since we all know computers aren’t the way to go in determining the best team in the country…I’ve come up with a better solution! Now besides sports, (football in particular) the next greatest thing a guy cherishes is the female body!! Now we can all tell what a particular university has to offer by its female student bodies, (pun intended)…So I’ve decided to put these broads to good use for a change and bring you the FSBCS! For the dumbasses who can’t understand acronyms that’s Female Student Body Championship Series! After all, what are the co-eds for anyway! The Contestants…
Kansas
Missouri
LSU
Oklahoma (too hard not to pass up!)
Oregon

Yummy…So what does your T-Mobile Fav 5 look like? Mine is as follows…
1. Oregon
2. LSU
3. Kansas
4. Missouri
5.Oklahoma…Given the fact the Bob Stoops’s son is a crybaby!

HOLY SHIT!!! Check that shit out…My FSBCS isn’t that far off of the BCS!

When Will Pat Riley Walk Away?
The question begs asking considering Dwyane Wade joined his trampled teammates last night for the first time since the disastrous four-game sweep at the hands of the Bulls in last season's playoffs and it didn’t make a damn bit of difference. Clearly Pat Riley couldn’t wait for the “cavalry to come back”, considering the fact that D-Wade is the only one not an AARP member and the lone member of the Heat that doesn’t mix Metamucil with his Gatorade, though Riles would never want his players to believe ''here comes the cavalry'' now that Wade's back….As all coaches would.

The good news Wade brings hopes to a team filled with geriatrics…Who have to catch the early bird specials these day considering they can’t stay awake past 8 o’clock. He brought reason to believe that, yes, one man can make that much of a difference. He made overcoming a 20-point deficit look quite feasible -- twice. Unfortunately the previously winless Sonics were just, well in Phil Jackson’s words…A mountain too steep to climb! Come on, we’re talking about the worst team in the league…Seattle! The Heat can’t even beat Seattle! I guess this means P.J. Carlisimo will be sending Riles a Christmas card for making his X’s and O’s look like the second coming of James Naismith. Surprisingly, Naismith hasn’t suited up for the Heat this year!

So with the Heat’s season in shambles…Mimicking the play of the Flounder Fishing out in the boonies at Pro Player Stadium, the question that should be raised is this. When will Pat Riley say F*** this and simply walk away? For a guy who has some “health concerns” clearly this can’t be helping any! I’m sure every time he watches film he wants to do his best impression of Charlie Weis and “vomit” watching this “6th Man Club” rec team! We all know no coach likes to lose and get asked the same redundant questions over and over to the point where reporters start hearing the answers coming out of their cake hole and begin looking at you like you have three heads…Hey Charlie Weis, how are you doing? However, for an egotistical maniac in Riles, who is just like all of the other flicke, phony people in Miami! Who stabbed Stan Van Gundy when he saw an opportunity for the team having damn good potential to win an NBA Championship, and then did courtesy of David Stern not wanting Mark Cuban to win a championship, (and the NBA isn’t fixed David, right. Sure! Thus, Riley became “The Benefactor”, (damn, I’m so funny) well, he’s not even two years removed when is he going to play the health card and walk?

It’s a given that he has too much pride just to walk away for the sake of, well, walking away…He came up with an excuse before, allowing Van Gundy to get the train back on the right track. Although we can rest at ease, once he goes into the sunset, he ain’t coming back, Jack! I will say his resume speaks for itself even if he is a back stabber…Although, one would have thought for a coach who has all of his credentials, he’d know how not to compile a team of “nursing home talent” to go along with one “whipper snapper” in Wade! Riles made his nursing home bed and not he’s rotting in it, but the question is for how much longer?

So when will Riley depart? Oh, in due time, in due time! Let’s see, the combined record of the Heats next seven opponents (including the scorching hot Celtics twice) through the end of November is 32-17 (.653), OUCH! That's before opening December with a six-game road trip out west that includes stops in Denver (6-3), Utah (7-2), the Clippers (5-2), Golden State (0-6) and Phoenix (6-2). Does anyone really think a 3-18 start is out of the picture? Given the fact that they can’t beat a winless team, well, if I were to put money on it…I’d put a five figure amount down.

If this “crystal ball” 3-18 record becomes reality, I don’t know about you, but I see Mr. Armani consulting with his brass of M.D.’s to discuss “his health”…Because clearly it’s not what it used to be! However, the good news could be that he’d be the top coaching candidate at the St Annes Nursing Center in Miami! Perhaps even D-Wade might take time out of his “movie” schedule to teach the old folks new maneuvers in their wheelchairs…Seeing as he seems to have first hand knowledge of this! Crying like a little bitch is optional!!

Emmitt Smith…
He might be the greatest running back ever to put on shoulder pads in the NFL from a statistical standpoint. Might be the holder of a couple Super Rings and MVP honors He might even be the greatest dancer to twinkletoes his way around a dance floor, (so says the popular vote) but one thing the Mighty Gator isn’t, he’s not a very damn good annalist! And that’s saying a whole hell of a lot considering the fact that he’s employed by ESPN…Who doesn’t have very high standards to begin with! But at this point he’s making Joe Theismann look better and better every time he decides to open his pie hole!

Why is it for a guy who played professional football for as long as Emmitt did and for as long as he did, how in the hell can he be so God awful talking about it?!?! Case and point…

Before Emmitt told us, did any know the 49ers blow goats…That Alex Smith is no better than Will Smith at the quarterback position…That the St. Louis Rams are in the NFC West and aren’t very good? That Shaun Alexander is over the hill! Hey Emmitt, thanks for stating the obvious! Although he did neglect to mention that Stuart Scott owns a seeing eye dog…Who always wanted to be the black version of Glass Joe on Mike Tyson’s Punch Out, not because of the glass jaw, but rather the glass eye!

Although I’ll admit I loved it when he came to Michael Vick’s defense…Playing the racial card, but then showing us those dance skills that capture hearts of Americans by doing his best Michael Jackson moon walk impression! Hell Mike would be proud, Emmitt did it faster than the "Jesus Juice Drinker" could ever do it!

Dare I say it, but….Bring back Theismann! OUCH! That hurt to say! Now my ears are bleeding…Oh well, Smith makes them bleed too!

Only in America…
Can one smoke up time after time…Live in a tree house and whatever else Ricky Williams has done, (please forgive me, I’ve lost track) only to be suspended by the NFL and then be reinstated. Yet once again Rick is on he’s way back to the NFL. Compliments of Roger Goodell! Now I don’t know about you, but I’m getting mixed signals from the commish! He has put his foot down on Chris Henry who has had a troubled past…Ditto for Pacman Jones, Michael Vick and Tank Johnson. Travis Henry impersonates Floyd Landis and his ass gets nailed to the cross, so then why does it appear Roger is marching to a different beat of the drum when it comes to the Pothead? Last time I checked, once a Pothead, well, always a Pothead!

I’m sure Rick got down on his knees and begged Goodell for forgiveness yet again, but how many lives does this cat get? I know they have nine, but hasn’t Williams exceeded the legal limit? Hell, before this whole little dog fighting incident, Vick got busted “allegedly” for a little secret compartment on a water bottle to hide his stash. What did Goodell do, he made like the NCAA is doing on the whole Reggie Bush taking money scandal…Swept it under the rug.

So let me get this straight, NFL players can smoke up as many times as they wish…Get the hammer dropped down on them only to in the future always know that they will be reinstated! And if they’re not, because of Ricky Williams, they’ll file a grievance with the league stating how come Ricky Williams gets third and fourth chances and I don’t?

The reality of all this is the fact that Goodell was put in a position yet again to set a precedence, set another standard in putting his foot down like he has always done in the past…Holding players accountable for their actions like he’s done so many times before! Instead, he chose for some reason to open up a can of worms!

Now will Williams services be welcomed by some NFL team? Does a whore sweat in church? You know they will…The question is by whom? Rick is still property of the Dolphins and there is no word what they will do with him. Although given the Floundering Fish’s predicament of losing Ronnie Brown the season and relying on Jesse Chatman to carry the load, one would think they’d take a good look at him once again. Or perhaps they’ll just release him ...If that’s the case and given the state of Larry Johnson in Kansas City or the lack luster running attack in Green Bay, one would think those would be viable options. Also with the state of Shaun Alexander perhaps Seattle? Maybe even Cleveland? However all this speculation hinges on if Cam Cameron decides to cut Mr. Pothead loose? Although at this point in the Dolphins season, I‘m thinking they’d welcome him back with open arms! They got bigger fish to fry than him!

So what will happen to Rick? Where will he end up? My guess is in some tree house after he violates the substance abuse policy yet again and makes Roger Goodell look like a F****** Idiot for reinstating him! God bless this country!! Only in America…Or should I say only in the NFL! Because if this was you or I at our average Joe Six Pack job, I’m thinking, now this is just a guess here that we no longer be working for Reid and Wright Inc.. Rather having to rely on our backup employment plan…Working at My Family's Nuts Store! Again, only in America… Don King, where you at bro!?!?!?

Starbury Has “Stuff” on Thomas, but What Kind of “Stuff” does Thomas have on Dolan?
Oh this is good stuff! Stuff that soap operas are made of!

"Isiah has to start me, I've got so much stuff on Isiah and he knows it. He thinks he can get me, but I'll get him first. You have no idea what I know." -Stephon Marbury

Oh yeah, well I’ll have you know you’re not the only one with “stuff” on your boss! I know stuff about my boss too…So stick that in your crack pipe and smoke it! Yeah, he drools on his pillow at night! How did I know that you must be wondering? Oh yeah, that’s right, I’m my own boss! I hope me, myself and I don’t become a little third grade snitch! Oh, believe me…The skeletons would be flying out of the closet! As far as what Marbury "knows about Isiah"... It's a little late to threaten Isiah with tarnishing his character after the shit that came out of his cake hole in court. Or is Starbury planning on telling us that as a NBA exc., well, he’s not very good…Again, great third grader mentality! Just one small problem, I’m thinking the “inside” information is already out on that!

Look, it’s no secret that Ringling Bros. and Barnum & Bailey Circus are run better than the Knicks…They are a joke from top to bottom. The bigger question we should be asking ourselves is, “What does Isiah have on Dolan that is keeping him employed?” It’s a given Starbury is a nut job who only cares about himself and how many cheap ass pairs of shoes Steve & Barry’s are selling for him, so this is a 72 par for the course…Nothing earth shattering here! Thomas must have something really good on Dolan!! Hell, there is no way this moron has a job if he didn’t!. Cost MSG 11 million and change in the lawsuit. Even better that Brown was only asking for 10 million...They gave him extra. The whole Larry Brown fiasco (can’t remember how much that cost). Now why can’t the New York press undercover this?!?!

Of course we’re sitting here talking about “practice!! We’re talking about practice!! Not a game…Not a game! We’re talking about practice!” Isiah was coached in college by Bobby Knight and well, so maybe Starbury’s going to dish the dirt on how Thomas wants to be the black Bob Knight. You know, all the yells, threats & sometimes physically assaults his players (head butting, grabbing, pushing, etc.)…Hell, I think that might be it! That’s what “Starbury” knows about Isiah and is willing to chirp like a prison Carney if Thomas refuses to give the ball back to him, so he can jack up 60 shots a night!

Okay, so it goes without saying that Starbury’s nothing more than a loose screw, and by watching Breakfast Club we all know that “screws fall out all over the…The world’s an imperfect place!” However, I’m the slightest bit intrigued as to what he “knows about Isiah”, that we don’t? Could it be Zeke takes five shits before every game? Could it be Thomas has a tat of a bar code tattooed on the “Bullseye” portion of his lower back? Fellas, you know what I’m talking about here…Well, at least you should! Or maybe it’s that Isiah still sleeps with an ALF doll, since he just seems to have a knack with the ladies! As for the ALF doll, no biggie…We all used to sleep with one! Especially the one where you squeeze his belly and he’d talk to you…Not that I’d know anything like that!

So, what…What is making him go “The Great Cornholio” on Zeke’s ass? Wait…Wait just a minute! I figured it out! The Knicks are a team of men (by age) that handle their issues like kids (by actions). This would fit the normal then!

Breaking News: Michael Jordan is attempting another comeback!
It seems M.J. is doing this because ex-wife Juanita just took him to the cleaners in their divorce settlement. It was only to the tune of 168 million…Not a big deal really! It’s not like that settlement eclipses the most expensive celebrity divorce on public record, in which Neil Diamond paid his ex-wife Marcia Murphey £75m. And Michael Stranhan thought he had issues with his ex ball-n-chain!

So does this mean Juanita just won her own version of Powerball? The final severance package, includes the couple's seven-acre estate in Chicago and custody of their three children, is expected to be agreed before the first anniversary of their last row, (pun intended) which was said to be about money. And given her real estate background something tells me the seven-acre crib will be on the market before you can say Virgicalimenta Flagantonio. Of course given that this is a buyers market right now and looks, well, it looks like Kobe Bryant will get a steal then, now doesn’t it! Not only will he play in Mike’s house, but he will also sleep in Mike’s house! I’m just hoping he’s not obsessed so much that he wants to sleep in the same bed where M.J. slept! Although, one never knows…Kobe has a thing of sleeping in other peoples bed! OUCH!

God damn…That’s a lot of F******** money to make a bitch go away! Yowsa! Although I will say that Double JJ had to put up with one the most egotistical cats ever to walk the face of the earth in his Airness. Now I don’t side with women, for I’m a guy….Well, last time I checked I was, but as off the wall as this might sound, I echo what Neil Diamond said after paying out of his ass… "She's worth every penny," he said. And I agree Ms. Former Jordan is too…Wonder if she’ll keep the last name? Have to admit…It’s pretty catchy!

You know what this means don’t you? Tiger Woods, you’re next! Right after Alex Rodriguez…because as the story goes, the beginning of the end for the Jordans was when M.J. got caught sneaking around the OLE chicken coupe, (house/bedroom/the five star "No Tell Hotel") with an "Adult Entertainer", (no word on whether she was blonde or not)!

I think I’m going to play Lotto tonight…The God damn state of Florida doesn’t believe in Powerball! Oh, and M.J., you better sell all the Hanes known to man! Although, you may want to chance your briefs you currently are sporting…I think you just shitted yourself after Juanita just did a deep cavity search on your ass! ZING!

Hey, What’d Ya Know…The Annual Charlie Weis Post Game Press Conference
I wish I had more to say than "Roll It", but I don’t! The clip speaks volumes! So with that…Um, well, Roll IT!

Notre Dame might want to see if Billy Madison is interesting in being the Head Leprechaun! Oh no wait...He is already!

Duke Plays in the "Duke Super Bowl" on Saturday!
Okay, so it might be the beginning of life on the Duke University campus as basketball takes center stage, but astonishingly that’s going to have to sit on the back burner for a while…Well, at least for this week as football, yes, I said football takes the spotlight, headlines, and whatever else there is. The Durham campus is in a frenzy, so much that it rivals North Carolina week, (in basketball) that is…Just thought I’d clarify that, wouldn’t want anybody think Duke is turning into a football school! Why it hasn’t been this insane for a non basketball, non lacrosse sandal since the ole ball coach and Dave Brown were on campus! So what’s all the buzz about in Krzyzewskiville? Duke is playing for a Super Bowl title on Saturday when they visit South Bend! Huh?

Turns out Duke football fans, (who knew this life form ever existed) can't wait until this weekend's matchup with Notre Dame in South Bend ...In fact that game has become the Duke Super Bowl. Now as a Notre Dame fan, I must say that this is exactly what the doctor ordered…I’m guessing he’s a Notre Dame fan too. This is perfect! Why is it perfect? That’s real easy, we all know what Charlie Weis has done in Super Bowls…Why he has four bling-bling souvenirs from them.

Not only has the game been dubbed the "Duke Super Bowl", but the website dukesuperbowl.com is dedicated to "celebrating Duke's chance to beat Notre Dame in a "REAL" tackle football game". Not only that, it points out that "this is our best chance for a big victory and to experience a bowl game". I’m guessing the appropriate name to call this "bowl game" is the "Wipe your ass because you have shit hanging from it…Oh wait, sorry, that’s just the brand of football you play" bowl!

Like all great websites, it’s updated daily by some future Drew Rosenhaus giving us tidbits of in depth analysis as they breakdown both teams. Teams who share the same God awful record at 1-9 and "rebuilding", although Duke is always in that mode…Charlie Weis has another "rebuilding" year, well he’ll be rebuilding his house after somebody torches it, but it won’t be in South Bend. However, besides the vomitial record both teams share, the website also points out another similarity…They have the same number of bowl wins over the past 10 seasons (none)…Again, awesome!

All this compliments of Charlie Weis! Although lets be real here…Notre Dame doesn’t have any shot of beating Duke! Why, if the Blue Devils run out of the tunnel on Saturday, why doesn’t NBC just call off the game…Save a lot of money that way! Hell, if Notre Dame can’t even beat back-to-back academies, why Duke’s going to roll them…Making dukesuperbowl.com blow all kinds of gaskets! The fact of the matter is this, Notre Dame has more talent, "supposedly" than Navy and Air Force…Both of which ran circles around them making them look worse than a powderpuff team and at this point the Iraqi Militia could beat "Weis’s Woefuls", (minus all the heavy artillery). Hell, the Irish are the worst team in the (don’t call me Division IA anyway more because some how it’s a form of racism) Division both literally and statistically…And numbers, well they don’t lie! Perhaps that’s why the Dookies are favored by five.

So to all the Cameron Crazies out there who are ready to jump through their skin and suck on every inch of Krzyzewski’s body…And I do mean every inch, don’t start consuming your daily intake of a case of Red Bull! My advice is wait until Saturday night when your team hoists the Vince Lombardi trophy, oops, I mean the "Wipe your ass because you have shit hanging from it…Oh wait, sorry, that’s just the brand of football you play" trophy showing the nation you’re indeed not as pitiful as Notre Dame! Some where Dave Brown and Steve Spurdog will be smiling and Joe Montana is asking for 100,000 from the university to actually admit he graduated from there!

Go Irish…And Charlie Weis, you make me want to PUKE!

Wyoming’s Coach Flips the "Dirty" Bird

In the grand scheme of things the state of Wyoming really doesn’t, well, matter! Not too often is there any earth shattering news coming out of the state grabbing national attention…Not to mention anything that might transpire at The University of Wyoming. More specifically “the other U Dub’s” athletic department. How bad must that suck…You bust your ass, both as coaches and as players, for what, to get a “Congratulations” by some 85-year old blue hair down at the corner store dubbed “The Corner Store” all because you go to school, live, play, and work in Nowhereville…Population, your ass!

Well seems as if University of Wyoming head football coach Joe Glenn has just had enough of this sorry ass life and wanted to do something that would not only be the talk of the town, but put him in the national headlines…Of course to help recruiting purposes! Mission Accomplished, Joe…Although I’ve got just a sneaky suspicion that Joe won’t be doing the whole Mountain West Conference Christmas exchange with University of Utah’s Head Coach Kyle Whittingham after Saturday!

Glenn didn't like how Utah tried an onside kick with a 43-point lead, and he let coach Kyle Whittingham know by doing his best Michael Vick, Dirty Bird impression. And they say Bill Belichick ran up the score! Although I will say, I see that the whole Michael Vick saga must not have reached Wyoming yet…See Joe, to be mentioned in the same breath as Michael Vick, well, it’s just not what it once was! Now of course like any goodie two-shoes conference officals do, the Mountain West Conference will review tape of the game and the nationally televised incident could prompt the conference to publicly reprimand Glenn. Oh no! It’s about damn time something happened in Wyoming…Last time I checked, the Knockaround Guys left several years ago! However, it must be noted that according to the conference handbook, obscene gestures or language are subject to at least a reprimand for a first offense. What is this, the YMCA? No obscene language? Huh? So instead of saying “That Mother F*****r”, what are you supposed to take a page out of the “Tweety Bird handbook” and call somebody a “Bad Ole Putty Cat”? Call somebody a "big meany"!…And then say “I'm telling, and you're going to get put in timeout and no t.v. for two whole hours! “

Okay, sure shooting the bird isn’t the best career move a coach can do or anybody else in an athletic environment, but to spit a spat like one is in the middle of watching "Kindergarten Cop"…Um yeah, sure that’s going to happen as soon as monkeys fly out of my ass! However, I have always held that movie in the highest regards…That flick taught me boys have penis’s and girls have vaginas! I’ve never been the same since…How awesome is that!

Of course, in the annual P.R. (say you’re sorry, even though you don’t really mean it) apology Glenn apologized for the gesture, saying…"I met with my team on Sunday and apologized to them for the gesture I made toward the Utah bench during the game," Glenn said in a statement. "I also want to apologize to all fans for that action. Football is an emotional game, and I let my emotions get the best of me. I felt it was appropriate for me to let my team and all fans know that I am truly sorry for that emotional moment." Gosh, that song and dance never gets old, does it? Although here’s an interesting thing that followed the “public relations apology”…Glenn said after the loss that he didn't remember giving the finger. "Honest to God, I can't even respond to it," Glenn said. "Maybe, I don't know." Impressive…Apologizing for something you can’t even remember!

And if the story can’t get any better, wait, there’s more! Glenn said at a weekly student luncheon earlier in the week that he could guarantee a win against Utah. My friend, don’t make bets that your team can’t cash! As Glenn was letting birds fly late in the game the Cowboy’s faithful of 42,000 began chanting "guarantee"…OOPS! Oh Shit! Perhaps coach Glenn was thinking “Go to hell you filthy couch burners, (West Virginia, Wyoming…It’s all the same!). Glenn said afterward that he regretted making the promise. "I got emotional last week and got my big Irish mouth going and made the guarantee," he said. "I'd probably like to have it back now. I wouldn't do it again. "Find the crow and I'll eat it."

I echo what Wyoming Athletic Director Tom Burman said about Glenn, “Coach Glenn has been a great ambassador for the University of Wyoming.” Yeah, he finally put not only the university, but the whole state of Wyoming in the national headlines! Coach Glenn leads by example! Just one thing of note…Don’t choke on your finger!

Colt Brennan’s Seeing Stars and Thinks His Name is "Heisman"
Coming into this college football season, the University of Hawaii listed their goals. In that list one would final…
Running the table and making it to a BCS game
Colt Brennan winning the Heisman Trophy, or worst case have Colt be invited to the Heisman ceremonies as one of the top finalists.

Well seeming the goal of Colt winning the Heisman and his Heisman campaign closed up shop in the San Jose State game…Although putting up Arena Football numbers he was less then impressive and any realistic shot of winning the award went up in flames!

However, that dream of the Heisman and flying to New York…Yeah, that one, well good news! Colt is currently dreaming of it and flying to New York as we speak! What do I mean? Well, check this out…It might help clarify things…Although in Colt’s case, well he’s just dazed and confused! Roll It!

OUCH! Colt Brennan…You just got knocked the F*** Out! DAMN! Why does my head hurt? According to the Hawaii trainers they asked Brennan two questions, both he answered wrong.

First one was: Where are you?
Colt’s Reply: New York

Second one: What’s your name?
Colt’s Response: John Heisman

A big shott out should go to Fresno State's Marcus Riley…For making the Colt Brennan "Heisman Dream" a reality!

Goodness!

Time to Come out of the Closet…
And say I love Ron Zook! Hey, I’m not afraid to admit it…I’m willing to overlook the fact that there’s a good chance he still pronounces the "S" in Illinoisssssssssssssss, but we all have our flaws. Okay, so my love for the man doesn’t run as deep as playing a game of tonsil hockey with the man…Or wouldn’t want to play the game of Pillow Biters vs. Pickle Pirates, but in reality this man possibly just saved my life on Saturday! How so? Well if you varmints had been reading my spits & spats recently, I vowed to jumped off my balcony out back, (I live on the fourth floor) if Ohio State played for another God damn National Championship…Although I must say, the river out back would’ve broken my fall!

Now because of the Fighting Zookers win on Saturday, well, it did two things. First, we realistically have the five best teams in the country up in the BCS top five, (yeah, those cries you hear are coming from Los Angeles & Gainesville respectively). And to that I’d just like to say…Go suck on your mommies, well, you know! However, (and yes there is a however) more importantly than that is the fact that Ron Zook is not only the leading candidate for Frat House President in Champagne…Now, he’s a virtual lock to get the seat! Just judging by his previous stints at frat houses…Well, there’s no better man! Hell, we’ve seen what he can do with Illinois Football, just imagine what he can do with Greek Life!

Sitting here, mid-November…Teams are now making like they’re in line for the women’s bathroom, jockeying for position as they try to punch a ticket to New Orleans, (what the hell do they do in there anyway?). And would you looky there…We have an ESPN favorite sitting on top once again in LSU. Come on, are they really the best team? That’s not as highly debatable as OSWho being number one, but it’s questionable…These cats have more lives than, well, a cat, as they’ve been living on a prayer, (gotta love the Bon Jovi reference)! Although, they are cats, so what do I expect. Most talented team, yes…But just ask Pete Carroll what talent got him in 2006 besides Bevo’s horns stuck up his ass compliments of Vince Young. One thing that we know is, while this is a great time for Big 12 football having three teams in the top five…Um yeah, this is like a love triangle. Too bad shit’s not going to last!

Look, we’re all riding the KU bandwagon…Looking forward to eating at the Mark Mangino Smorgasbord where the theme is, "If you out eat Mark, your food is on us!" I’m guessing that applies literally too considering you’re most likely to yack and blow chunks all over the place if one can actually step up to that challenge! Those are some big shoes, pants, shirts, and whatever Eclipse man wears to fill! No joke! The consolation prize will simply be that one Big 12 team is standing…Now who will that be? Got me hanging by John Kruk’s nut! I could sit here, show my grapes and pick a team…However, if I say Peyton Manning was going to get picked six times last night everybody would’ve looked at me like I had three heads!

In reality it’s a three team race…The top two, followed by the Big 12 representative. Now, ever since the Michigan game, the second game of the year, I’ve been consulting with my doctor to see if he can transform me into a Duck! I figured if they’re "shims" roaming all around, turning their flab-a-dab-a-ding-dongs inside out, why couldn’t I join the Huey, Duey, Louey population and talk like this. Although here’s a question, what’s more likely to happen…Dennis Dixon wins the Heisman? Oregon plays for a National Championship? Or, Mark Mangino signs up for NutriSystem? Hmm…? Tough ones…Although I’m not going to do a Mark McGwire here and leave my grapes in the "Andro Bottle"…I’m going to show off my buddies!

I think we’re all set for a LSU-Oregon National Title game even if the Fighting Mangino’s run the table on their way to the Big 12 Title. Although the second ranked team seems to change more than I change my tighty whities…But I really believe these two will run the table! Oh well, that’s just my thought…However, let it be known I prefer blondes with the name "Candy" over brunettes with the name "Roxy". Whatever that means…But what if that redhead "Cherry", (go figure) shows up in New Orleans, all bets are off!

To be contiuned….

Rob Stone Takes on a Red Hot Chile Pepper Without A Double Bagged Tongue
For those of you who might’ve missed the epic football battle last Friday night on ESPN between Nevada and New Mexico State, well, allow me just to say I can’t blame you one bit! To me, football in Las Cruces is very similar to life on Mars…Nobody really gives a shit about it! A perfect place for Hal Mumme to bring his pass happy offense to…A place where they have landing pads for UFO’s. How awesome is that?

It’s also a perfect place to have Chile Pepper Institution …Out in the middle of Nowheresville! I’m guessing Mr. Tabasco Sauce himself just might be an Aggie/Chile Pepper graduate!
Apparently Rob Stone must’ve lost a "Spring Break" type bet to his colleagues Sean McDonough and Chris Speilman early in the day! Rob might be a sideline reporter by night, but during the day he’s a Flaming Dr. Pepper!

Guess he forgot what we always learn as two-year olds…"Don’t put that in your month!" We all know milk does a body good…However, in Rob’s case only a double bagged tongue would’ve help him! Roll it…Simply hilarious!

Don Shula’s take on New England: “The Spygate thing has diminished what they've accomplished”
We all knew it would just be a matter of time before this happened…And now it has thanks to the Patriots comeback over the Colts in Super Bowl XLI ½ Sunday. What, you ask? Members of the 1972 Dolphins are coming out of the wood work and shitting themselves in their Depends! Why are they shitting themselves? Realistically this years Pats have the best shot of running the table since the 1985 Bears, (that’s debatable and up for discussion). Sure the Colts came close a few years back at 13-0, but while the “Undefeated Kool-Aid” was in the refrigerator that nobody really wanted to drink, well, besides the media…But what the hell do they know, they just chase stories!

Well, this years version of the “undefeated story” is worth chasing…With a prolific offense that nobody has ever seen, with more weapons than our country has overseas and a stout defense to match it, New England is very much poised to match the 1972 Dolphins as the only team to run the table. As I said a few weeks back after the victory over the Cowboys, the only thing stopping the Pats are the Pats themselves…If they want to run the table, they will! If they don’t, they won’t! If they want to rest their starters towards the end of the season and risk losing a game, well, so be it! The ’72 Dolphins will be living in another wet dream! However, judging how Bill Bellicheat has handled this season after the whole Patriotgate black cloud…Not giving a shit about nothing, well don’t count on that happening! Some may call it foolish, idiotic, and all that mumble jumble, risking injury…But we all saw Matt Cassell get the hook a few weeks back in a blowout of the Dolphins. So clearly this team defies all logic!

So what kind of words of wisdom does Don Shula have about the 2007 version of New England? According to Shula, even if history remembers the 2007 Patriots as the league's second perfect team, it will also remember them as cheaters:

“The Spygate thing has diminished what they've accomplished. You would hate to have that attached to your accomplishments. They've got it," Shula told the Daily News yesterday. "Belichick was fined $500,000, the team was fined $250,00 and they lost a first-round draft choice. That tells you the seriousness or significance of what they found.

"I guess you got the same thing as putting an asterisk by Barry Bonds' home run record. I guess it will be noted that the Patriots were fined and a No.1 draft choice was taken away during that year of accomplishment. The sad thing is Tom Brady looks so good, it doesn't look like he needs any help."

While he’s right about everything that he blew out of his cake hole, we’ve given Patriotgate a colonoscopy the entire year…All I question here is his motive. Why spray this junk now? Is it a coincidence that it comes on the heels of New England winning Super Bowl XLI ½? I’m doubting that! Every time a team comes close to challenging the Dolphins record, members always seem to have a hard on about having to answer questions! Remember these words of wisdom when the Colts were making a run at it… “Don’t call me when they’re in my neighborhood, call me when they’re on my block!” Riiiiiiiiiiggggggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhtttttttttttttt! Yeah, and how about if I alert you guys when Bill Hoodie Man rings your freaking doorbell! Would you like that, huh?

Shula is right in all regards: The Patriots are a great team with a good chance of going undefeated. Bill Belichick will join Shula in the Hall of Fame some day. But anyone who believes that Patriotgate will be forgotten by then is kidding himself. I just can’t help but wonder, what would’ve been said if the Colts didn’t choke on their grapes Sunday…And they were the ones once again poised to make a run at the Dolphins mark, what would’ve been said then? We know something would’ve tried to down play the likelihood that some team has a chance to reach the undefeated!

Now love them or hate New England, (and most of us hate them…And Patriotgate added more fuel to those fires) personally I hope they do go unbeaten! For this precise reason, to shut the entire 1972 Dolphins pie holes up! So they can stick those champagne corks that they love to pop so much up their old and wrinkly asses once and for all! So the Dolphins will have to move over in their elite company…Although watch out, the cameras will likely be rolling!

Which Record Breaking Performance Over the Weekend was the Best?
WHOA! They say records are made to be broken, but three on the same day and four in less than the 24 hours…All I can compare it to is being at the Playboy Mansion for the Mid Summer Night Dream party and first you see Miss March 2003, then Miss September 2004…Followed up by Miss November 2005 and finally Miss July 2002. By now you’re just in awe and losing track of all sense of reality…For every time you turn around it keeps getting better and better and really hope that’s it’s not a dream!

That’s kind of how this past Saturday & Sunday went, it just kept getting better and better from a record performance stand point! First there was Rock Chalk Jayhawk, (or Miss March 2003, whichever you prefer) opening up a can on the Fighting Callahan’s rolling up the most points ever scored against Nebraska and taking out frustration which had built up over the Cornhuskers 36-game winning streak…Which was the second longest losing streak to one school.

A few hours later, the Navy Midshipman, (or Miss September 2004) upstaged the Jayhawks as they were able to snap the longest losing streak in the country which stood at 43 games against Weis’s Woefuls. Two of the longest losing streaks to a particular team snapped in the same day…Within a few hours of each other, dare I say it? WHOA! There wasn’t a full moon or something was there? I mean there’s nothing superstitious about Saturday, November 3, is there?

If that wasn’t enough streak for one afternoon, the night cap was just as enjoyable to see…Well, if you’re a Razorback fan, or support The Nutthouse. Darren McFadden, (Miss November 2005) yeah, all he did was rush for a career-high and SEC-record 323 yards and a touchdown as Arkansas stormed past 23rd-ranked South Carolina, 48-36. Oh yeah, lets not forget, who also threw for a touchdown on the night too…All the while putting his name back in the Heisman Trophy debate, while Matt Ryan consequently took his name off of it!

And if that wasn’t enough, yesterday Adrian Peterson, (Miss November 2005) rushed for an NFL-record 296 yards for Minnesota in Sunday's game, putting him well on pace to break Eric Dickerson's rookie record for the season — and within range of Dickerson's all-time mark for yards rushing in one year. I got one word for this…WHOA! Clearly, Mr. All Day ran all day on the San Diego defense in route to showing that even as a rookie he might indeed be the best back in the league.

Notice the numerous usage of the term "WHOA"…I mean what more is there to say? Four of the most unbelievable things to happen in football all happens on the same weekend…HOLY SHIT! Just one question, which one is the best…?

I know, I know…It’s impossible to choose over Miss March 2003, Miss September 2004, Miss November 2005 and Miss July 2002! However, let’s say Pacman Jones held a gun to your head at the Playboy Mansion forcing your punk ass to choose one of them…Which one would it be?

Well for myself, I tend to look at the multiple choice question that has no right or wrong answer like this…Look, okay so we didn’t know Kansas was going to open up a can on Nebraska, but we all knew Kansas was going to win the game. So sorry Miss March 2003, you’re eliminated. Likewise with Navy…Okay, so maybe not likewise, but we all knew if Navy was going to break the streak this would be the year to do it because they were/are indeed the better team…Yes, it was still surprising to see it done, but not shocking! Sorry Miss September, you’re gone! Now setting a SEC record of 323 yards, that’s not expected, neither is setting an NFL record of 296! The one thing I will say about both is we all knew McFadden was capable of these video games type numbers, thus him being a Heisman hopeful. Okay, perhaps not to the tune of 323 and no disrespect to Run DMC, but I’m going to have to go with Miss July 2002, (or excuse me, Adrian Peterson) as the best record breaker of the weekend!

For the San Diego Chargers, who last time I checked had a pretty damn good defense…And a passing game in Minnesota’s is virtually non-existent, to allow A.D. to do what he did, not to mention the rookie factor in all this, well, it’s just mind boggling!

So there you have it, when Pacman Jones holds a gun to my head I choose Miss July 2002…Who do you choose?

Bill Cowher to South Bend….?
Now that’s an interesting development brought to you by yours truly. While there’s no truth to the rumor it makes you sit back and go hmm, at least for a second. Look, we all know Charlie Weis isn’t going anywhere after he signed that contract which virtually gave him ownership of the university, but to say he isn’t on the Budweiser Hot Seat is like saying Andy Reid doesn’t live in a "drug emporium". So Charlie gets a pass for this year, a pass, that’s funny…Perhaps if he would’ve passed on third down instead of running wide on third down, before he passed on attempting a game-winning field goal…Well, nevermind! That’s just the way the season has gone for the Irish!

Here’s the interesting part, we all know the good ole story about Ty Willingham after three years under the dome. Treated the job as a nine-to-fiver, (or excuse me) three…Had to make that tee time! So with that, his recruiting suffered immensely while his golf game flourished. Even so, one thing you could never say about T-Willy, he never had the worst team in the county like Weis does right now, (see the Delaware-Navy game). Sure, besides his 2002 "Return to Glory" team, (please see the green T-shirts), the ole stoic coach didn’t bask in the glory, conversely they wouldn’t get beaten by the local YMCA team and Weis would this season…Which I’ll have you know is a juggernaut in my neck of the woods.

Weis is known for his great X’s and O’s, his multi-packages and formations and etc., but the one that I must question is his teaching abilities to 17, 18, & 19-year olds. Yes, he took Ty’s players and made them into an offensive machine…However, now, with supposedly "better, more talented players" he can’t even beat Navy. Come on, he hand picked these guys! When a team can’t use any shotgun formation for fear of the ball flying over the quarterback’s noodle, that shows me the teaching aspect of football is not getting done, by the way all shotgun formations have gone MIA this year! It’s the entire teaching aspect of college football that is, well, it’s plain to see it’s not getting done in South Bend.

He can scheme and whatever else he chooses to do, but the offensive line hasn’t learned to block, (see the five sacks Navy had), the quarterbacks don’t know when to throw the ball away, and that’s just for starters…The list of things wrong are longer than a fresh roll of Angel Soft that one wipes their ass with. Good to see a roll of toilet paper and Notre Dame football have something in common!

All we hear is, oh, wait for the next two years when Notre Dame has the number one recruiting classes…Oh really, ranked number one by who, Todd McShay? What the hell does he know? He was all over Jimmy Clausen’s dick a year ago…And well, how’d that turn out this year? Yeah, not too well! It doesn’t really matter if Notre Dame brings in the number one recruiting class next season, two, three, four seasons from now or not, because if you can TEACH them, not coach them, (big difference) then all that talent goes for naught! Case and point, we’re currently seeing it, because I thought this years class along with last years was supposed to be pretty good as well! I wonder if Cowher’s a better teacher?

While Weis may not be going anywhere anytime soon considering he owns Touchdown Jesus, for a former high school teacher and coach…One would’ve thought that he known how to do just that, teach! Perhaps if he did Notre Dame wouldn’t have to use a YMCA playbook while setting records of futility in the process in 2007!

An Andy Reid Video Before His Home Became a "Drug Emporium"…
Really, it's a fascinating video! One that will leave you shaking you head even more so…Although it’s okay to want to be a bobblehead!

Through this four-minute clip we see Reid as a great family guy…That his kids are the most important to him! Who enjoys having gatherings at the crib, however that of the family and friends variety instead of the Philadelphia cartel! Although the must surprising element of this video would have to be his wife Tammy. Learning that it's Tammy Reid, who really runs the household, (please see her business card) and that Andy Reid says the only time he ever put his foot down and said no to one of his kids was when his daughter wanted to play football,.

Look, everybody can say what the want of Heckyl and Jekyll being two grow adults and all that nonsense…And while that maybe true, just one thing people are forgetting! They’re still living at home…Which means, yeah they’re in their early twenties which means they’re accountable for their own actions, but when you still live in mommies and daddies house they’re just as responsible if not more so! By not nipping this in the bud has made a mountain out of a mold hill.

If you’re an Andy & Tammy Reid supporter than this following video isn’t going to change nothing. If you’re like me who thinks Andy & Tammy somewhat, if not mostly to blame for where their family troubles have lead them then this following video will leave you thinking… "What went wrong? How11did this happen?" It’s simple…The "Head Coach of the Head Coach is a blind as a bat!

Is Tyrone Willingham on the Budweiser Hot Seat?
For all of you who thought Ty Willingham got a raw deal as Notre Dame kicked him to the curb after his third season in South Bend because of his race having a lot to do with the firing rather than the number and the Coors Cold Hard facts…Let me ask you something! If Willingham shall get fired after his third year out in Husky land, will the same race card be played and will the same kind of criticizism be heard, (i.e. playing the famous ole race card again) …Or in this particular case will numbers suffice? I’m betting on the numbers! Why? That’s real easy…Plain and simple, it’s not Notre Dame!

Isn’t it funny how the same man can get axed from one school because of his race and the possibility of getting canned three years later for another school due to the numbers he puts up, (or lack there of) when in reality he had the same kind of dreadful numbers in South Bend.
I'm not sure if U-Dub is considering axing Willingham. Although lets read the words of U-Dub’s presdient Mark A. Emmert…

UNIVERSITY OF WASHINGTON

OFFICE OF THE PRESIDENT

Mark A. Emmert, President

October 29, 2007

Dear Husky Fans,
I have received email comments from you and your fellow fans about the state of Husky Football. As a native of Washington and a UW alumnus, I know very well the competitive traditions of our university. Like many of you, I grew up with Husky Football. I share your frustration and disappointment with the team’s current position. The same is true of everyone involved with the program.

I also know that the young men on our team are giving the UW everything they have. They are working hard and hanging together during this challenging time. As they do so, I intend to give them my full support and encouragement each and every game. They deserve no less. They are our Huskies, and they should be treated as such. There are five games to be played this season, and our team needs our support.

Sincerely yours,

Mark A. Emmert

President

301 Gerberding Hall - Box 351230 - Seattle, Washington 98195-1230 - 206-543-5010 - FAX: 206-616-1784

Look, numbers don’t lie…And the numbers in the case tell us that while as head coach at Washington his mark now sits at 9 wins and 22 losses, and with a loss this Saturday he will be the first coach in Huskies history to have 3 straight losing seasons. Lets not neglect to mention that as a recruiter, well, that’s where the problem begins! Oh yeah, that was the knock on him at South Bend too…Couldn’t get the players, but the excuse was Notre Dame’s standard were too high! While there’s a lot of truth in that, what’s the excuse for him not getting the players to sign with the Huskies?

Currently Willingham has concocted another mediocre recruiting class which ranks an impressive 45th by Rivals.com. Very impressive Ty. While during his first two years in Seattle he complied the 36th ranked class the year before and the 35th ranked class in 2006. Clearly he is bringing in better athletes every year to remedy the problems at Washington….And a one legged duck doesn’t swim in a circle, right? But then again, it’s a racial thing, right? Instead of what all sports come down to…The numbers

The knock on Willingham in South Bend was that he was putting up better numbers on the golf course instead of in the football department. He recruiting was a joke, since he always had a three o’clock tee time at South Bend’s finest golf courses…Consequently the days trying to be the next Tiger Woods proved to be his undoing in South Bend! When contacted about the rumors of his eventual dismissal and the letter the president wrote to Husky fans, Willingham was again stoic yet eloquent and somewhat forceful with his response on why he is the right man to lead Washington back to gridiron success.

"FFFFFFOOOOOOOOOOOORRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEE"

So nice to see he has learned from his mistakes!

The Miami Dolphins are Good for Something!
I’ve been racking my brains trying to figure out what in the hell the Miami Dolphins are good for? Believe me, this was no easy task…However, after beating my head against the wall, well, it has a hole in it now. The wall that is…Although, my head might have some too! Damn, my head hurts…Hurts worse than even a brain freeze!

The Miami Dolphins might be the NFL version of the Notre Dame Fighting Irish, especially being forced to watch that whole England Mud Bowl last week…While you won’t be forced to watch this following video, believe me, you better! It’s as good as the Miami Dolphins get in 2007! So sit back, grab a brew, or two…Hell, make it a whole case, and enjoy the show!

Viewer discretion is advised…And so is a computer with Real Player! Otherwise no show for you!

http://play.rbn.com/?url=nfl/nfl/open/dolphins/demand/2007_MakingTheCalendar_300.rm&proto=rtsp&lid=2007_MakingThe Calendar_300.rm

Britney Spears and Wade Phillips…HUH?
What in the hell is going on in Los Angeles, California? Grady Little gets the ultimate jam job by the Dodgers. Kobe Bryant is proving that any high-profile, glorified crybaby can force his hand to be traded when his current team blows more than a whore in a brothel. Then Lamar Odem does what we all love to do when we get a red light…Stomp on the gas and blow right through it. Just one small problem, watch out for the lady in a Geo Prism…Don’t T-Bone her ass while driving a Mercedes. If that wasn’t enough, we now have David Stern stepping in and cracking down on Lakers owner Jerry Buss on Wednesday by announcing that Buss would be fined $25,000 and suspended two games for a drunk driving conviction in September following an arrest last May. How awesome is that…Your owner gets loaded at the Playboy Mansion, gets pulled over on his way home for trying to do his best Michael Waltrip impression and Stern feels the need to fine Buss’s ass and suspend him, while he gives Isiah Thomas a get out of jail free card. Why that makes perfect sense to me!

So much so that I’m just trying to figure out how in the hell does that work? I mean really now…How does that work? I mean Buss doesn't actually do anything, at least not as far as the play on the court is concerned. Does a suspension only apply for home games? And we all thought Paris Hilton’s jail sentence was comical. Does it mean he’s not allowed in the building? Honestly, what the hell does this mean!

If that wasn’t enough, earlier this week Tony "Bobble Boy/Purse Holder" Romo was, but what else, linked to another big name celebrity. Shit, he’s better at that than playing football on Sunday…Lets see, Jessica Simpson? Check.Carrie Underwood? Check. Sophia Bush? Check. And now you can add a train wreck to that list too as Romo was mentioned with Britney Spears…To which Bobble Boy denied any involvement. "She was at the same place. I wasn't partying with her, that's for sure." I’m sure he says this same line when referring to Scott Van Pelt too! Wow, I know that’s a relief for Jerry Jones to hear since he did just sign over both Southfork and Ewing Oil to you!

However, Spears added a little spice to the situation during an interview Wednesday on Ryan Seacreast’s radio show. When asked if she was dating Romo, Spears said, "Who?" The interview abruptly ended. Hey Jerry, enjoy sleeping in your bed…You got T.O. on one side who nobody knows when he’s going to blow and Romo on the other…Who he thinks he’s the modern day Hugh Hefner!

Whatever the "Lovebirds" have going, one thing’s for sure pop princess, (on her way to becoming the new version of Anna Nicole Smith) does indeed seem to have connections to the Dallas Cowboys locker room in some respect! No, it’s not Terrell Owens, (but she could be down with brown) Jason Witten, Nick Folk, Jason Garrett…But rather the head Cowboy himself, Wade Phillips. HUH? Turns out besides being a guru of the 3-4 defense, Bum’s son deserves some consideration to be a judge on Dancing with the Stars in the offseason. For he knows his dance moves better than he knows not to have a game plan that calls for "Tom Brady to beat you."

As the story goes Cowboys coach Wade Phillips said Spears attended one of his daughter’s, Tracy, shows who’s a dancer at an L.A. club called "Blackout". And the next thing Tracy knew, Spears was coming out with a new album called "Blackout," and had "borrowed" some images in her videos. Phillips, who said he is not happy with Spears because some of the images used in her videos were borrowed. He may call it "borrowed", but I call it stolen! It case you’re unaware about the moves in question, well check out this following clip to refresh your memory…


Now I have no clue who’s lying here or what not, whether it’s Romo, whether it’s Phillips, whether it’s Ms. Train Wreck herself…Honestly, I really have no clue whether Spears actually "borrowed" shit from Tracy…Don't really think "Blackout" is such a unique name….Although we do know Britney isn’t the sharpest tool in the shed, but again, I give a rats ass! I just find it very amusing and down right comical that Wade Phillips is actually spending time thinking about Britney Spears…Then again, he did game plan for Tom Brady to beat him. Yeah, great call coach!

Oh, to be Jerry Jones…No thanks, I’ll pass! Just your typically day in LALA Land., I mean at Fort Valley Ranch!

Thanks to a….
10-year old pecker head that I’m guessing who just finished up watching an episode of Beavis & Butthead deciding to go play with matches and, oops, started a blazed which forced 15,000 people from their homes, destroying 21 houses and 22 other buildings, injuring three people and blackening more than 38,000 acres.

While the youth was left in the custody of his parents, awaiting word on whether he would be prosecuted…The state of California was left in the custody of this. If shit could get any worse…



Well, it just did!